Saturday, June 6, 2009

The Battle in My House

The enemy crouches ready, each troop armed with every weapon they can manage. The first strike is imminent; a clash inevitable. They've awaited it for hours, plotting their tactics and sure that, this time, they will emerge from the fray victorious!

But the General is aware of their evil plan, and knows the location where they lie in wait. He also knows they are expecting him to come from the West. And he is ready.

The General is unarmed, and vastly outnumbered, and yet he charges courageously into the battle... From the North! A brilliant offensive move! The enemy is sufficiently surprised, and in the ensuing confusion, the General wrests weapons from one of the troops. They fall back to regroup!

The battle is on! I sit hunkered here before my computer, hoping to escape the din. Thunder sounds over my head, the missiles fly, and shrieks pierce the evening as they hit their target with precision.

This is no ordinary battle.

This is Saturday Night Pillow Fight With Daddy.

The General advances his attack. Oof! One of them blind-sides him with a sofa pillow! No fear, he quickly recovers. Children dive behind the beds as he takes aim, but this time the pillow just barely swipes a blonde head. He is unarmed again and, seeing his disadvantage, the troops advance once more... The littlest one latches onto his leg, wanting to be picked up. This puts The General at further disadvantage! Will he succumb to the barrage of pillows and fall to the ground, vulnerable to the enemy's notorious Deadly Dog Pile?

My ears strain to hear any signs that would tell the outcome. What's that? They are coming down the stairs! They are sure to discover me here, hiding out with the computer.

But they wouldn't attack a pregnant mama... Would they?


Bro. Daniel said...

in the words of my favorite radio man Pual Harvey..."and now, the rest of the story.."

I was getting ready to head up stairs for the always longed for pillow fight... when there was a knock at the door out front. The Milk man, if you can believe, was coming by to drop of his credit card ( I know, you really dont believe me but all of it is true ) I saw him off after a bit and could hear the children awaiting my customary entrance through the door to dining area. So, with only my wife spotting me while washing dishes, I stealthily enter in through the mud room. With the way the doors work in our house I cut of one surprised two in the stair case and the other three to far away for a direct hit.

No dog pile on Daddy, and the screeches were from Joseph accidentally stepping on Jessica's fingers two or three times. My aim from a distance was off but my close range was sighted right in.

I love my family!

Elizabeth said...

But they wouldn't attack a pregnant mama... Would they?

Going from my personal experience ... I'd keep my guard up.

Annette said...

They are Coates children . I wouldn't put it past them to attack a pregnant mama!!! LOL

Dani Joy said...

GREAT FUN!! Did they get you? Even a little? I need to have more fun with my boys. They get really out of control though.

Going camping this week! we can´t wait!

Elizabeth said...

Oh, and I'll totally agree with Dani Joy. I'll get down and really attack my boys from time to time, but I have come out of it with a bloody nose and black eyes... It's like the boys just don't know when to quit! It's like they know the rules, but they're blinded by the heat of the battle!

Beth Stetler said...

i enjoy reading your blog. i was born and raised in guatemala and honduras (missionary parents) and now my family and i are missionaries in mexico. feel free to email sometime (

Tammy said...

Elizabeth, Annette, and Dani Joy, yeah, they got me, but not too badly! lol

I don't know what to tell you about the boys getting too rough. Mine don't overdo it, and the only reason I can think of is that they learn from their Dad's example that Mom and the girls are weaker vessels and should be treated a little differently than the boys.

...Now, if we could only get my girls to go easier on their brothers... ;o)

Tammy said...

Thank you, Beth! It's nice to "meet" you. :o)

Elizabeth said...

I meant to include this in my other comments, and keep forgetting.

Bro. Daniel...I was a big Paul Harvey fan too. Paul Harvey is probably the first person that I don't actually know that I was a little saddened by his death. He was entertaining, informative ... and he just had that voice!

Sonya said...

Hola Tammy! Even though you don't know me, I wanted to write and let you know how much I appreciate your blog. I found you through the Lockwood family, and your posts are so encouraging to me and my family. I lived in Costa Rica myself, so its fun to read about your adventures in Guatemala! So - I just wanted to pop in and "gracias!" - I am probably one of the many people who you do not know, but who you minister to and inspire on a regular basis!